I just submitted Farv's picture to SketchySantas.com.

Everyone remembers this gem, right? :D

I was playing DDO for a little bit, got a Dwarf Barbarian to level 6, and a very small amount left on the last rank to level 7, and just couldn't play anymore. Not being able to solo with out a hired NPC really sucks.

Damn it he is still under house arrest? Didn't anyone tell the Judge that his nuts have an appointment with an Air Soft rifle? Sort of a Holiday tradition. :P

Really Farve I hope your computer feels better soon and you can chill again on the Internets.

So I've been playing DDO. Kind of repetitive, but it does seem to be good for a Dungeon Crawl here and there. Though I wouldn't have bothered putting any effort into it if it weren't free.

Farv's machine has teh AIDS eh?

Last I heard Farva was on house arrest still, and his computer got infected with some virus that fucked his shit up. Probably from all that creepy porn he watches.

I want one of those. No I need one of those.

Hey Farva are you still alive? I kind of miss your random posts. I sure how you didn't get "shanked" in your Mom's yard. :P

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/29/magazine/29fob-consumed-t.html?_r=1

I told you this would become a real product.

John, you seriously have to help hunt this down. =o

I mean it. Recruit Jason - I'll pay for a bootleg if some shady guy is selling them in front of the theatre. Though it's probably still too new to get anything...

John,

Other than the douchenozzles at the game store, who's been making fun of the Wii?
Someone should shove a wiimote up their ass. While playing that music.

No... that's gettin gay again. Oh god... too much gay. It's overwhelmingay.

You are all the gayest gays to ever gay up being gay. The only thing gayer than you, is that music. What the hell. I mean, my man-on-elf porn has to have a pulsing techno beat, or I just can't get in the mood.

WTF....

Okay no one can ever say shit to me about picking a Wii over the X-Box 360. You can call the Nintendo games gay, but they aren't that gay... even that muscle man thing. Just goes to prove that all those twitch kill 15 year old boys living in their parents basements are in the closet or something. :P

I picked this up for the 360 but I've yet to play it. I've heard very little about the game so far other than "zomg u can sexxorz!" =/

Is it really THAT gay if its an elf?



From the new game DragonAge.

Coolest. Cake. Ever.

Also this.

I think I may have found the next piece of art for my house.
Hand-painted in oil.

Fuckin A!! Alice in Wonderland via Tim Burton!!! Holy awesomeness!! And of course it can't be done without Johnny Depp...although he looks quite a lot like Wonka again....I CAN'T WAIT!! And it will totally freak out little kiddies too..hehe :)~

Man, I totally have got to remember this for next year's halloween festivities.
Meat-loaf hand. Nails and wrist bone are onion. Browned cheese makes the skin. Mashed potatoes used to clean up the presentation.

John,

Did NetFlix raise their prices again? I was looking at starting the minimum-level service up just to get movie streaming and it's $8.99. The bottom-tier $4.99 plan is limited to 2-hours of streaming a month. =/

And I want to go to New Zealand. Not Australia. It's close to Australia, but it isn't. Australia is dangerous. Even the grass is poisonous down there and will try to kill you. And ants that eat meat. Which apparently they're breeding in large numbers to release them into the wild to eat a frog or something. (Yay! Lets release large numbers of flesh-eating insects into the wild! I haven't seen that as the plot of a movie before!) I'd be afraid to leave my hotel room.

New Zealand just has spiders that eat birds. And elves. I can enjoy the scenery looking out the window of my hobbit hole. I won't be swimming. Especially not in the ocean. Things live in the ocean.

GLEEEEeeeeee!

Okay why the hell would anyone go swimming in the ocean after reading something like this?

You still want to move down under Mr. Gaggins? If the giant spiders don't get you then this bad boy will!

Rambo hunting down Genome soldiers?
That... cold be epic.
Especially if the head supersoldier is like... an evil genetically-superior clone of Rambo.
We'll call him... Liquid Rambo.



Rambo...
RAMBO?
RAMMMMBOOOOOUUUUUUUUU!

HOLY SHIT. This is awesome!

So, Farva apparently isn't dead.
He did, however, get into gay porn to pay off some of his fines.

Suck fest... so true, on so many levels.

I think I'm almost completely dead on gaming. I picked up an XBox360 and I'm using it primarily as a substitute for my laptop in my entertainment center downstairs. (Or at least I will be once it is completely put back together.) So my "next gen" console exists to stream episodes of South Park from my computer upstairs down to the TV.

I've got Batman: Arkham Asylum- the hands-down zomg moist-in-the-pants aweze0meistest Batman game evar. With the insane Mark Hamill Joker. (Hamill>Romero>Nicholson>Ledger) and I've played it... enh... twice. Maybe about an hour total. But I've watched an entire season of Aqua Teen Hunger Force. =/

Well until the next expansion anyway, then its a whole new suck fest.

If they had internet access in prison that'd be awesome. Free rent, free food, all your guildies would be right there in the cell block. I mean, what you have to do to earn DKP is a bit humiliating, but the flavor goes away- Those epix are here to stay.

He was on WoW today, so I don't think he went to Jail

That is a good question. Farve are you still around? We haven't heard from you in a while. Did you get sent off to the big house?

Is Farva still alive or did he get shanked in the yard during his time in the big house?

I could always start.

There is a whole world of midget porn waiting to be downloaded.

Yeah dude but what the hell could you possibly fill the drives up with? I mean you don't collect pron.....

:)

One of my HDs spun out on me a lil' while back. I managed to get it back long enough to pull the data off it, but hadn't bothered to replace it just yet.

So I'm looking at NewEgg...

1.5TB drives. For a hundred dollah.
2TB drives. For under two hundred dollah.

TB. Mere gigs of space is for pussies. We discuss our storage capacity in teras now. Bitches.

1998 - $229/Gb
2003 - $3.88/Gb
2007 - $0.88/Gb
2009 - $0.10/Gb

Gad... damn.

I guess the next benchmark is whoever can get the first petabyte full of DVDs. =D

John,

This is one of those Flash games I was telling you about- side-scrolling shooty type, and a good example of what's possible with the system.

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/512407

Farva wanted to go SPECIFICALLY for the anal rape, just one big chain of homosexual anal intercourse, and he wanted to be right in the middle of it.

the 1 of oct.

Yeah much worse than going to the county lock up for some nice butt raping.....

So when do they let you off house arrest?

house arrest suck sooo bad

Ahh behold the awesome that was the 80s...

Behold the awesomeness that is the Bacon Jam recipe.

This is super cool!

So how is everyone doing here at the blog?

Scott,

Packages like this are what I was talking about with computers. Basically all you need is another $30 for a DVD-R (or just pull one out of your own system) and you've got a pretty bitchin' machine ready-to-go for $300. (You'll need to "obtain" a copy of either XP, Vista, or 7, but that's easy enough.)

http://www.tigerdirect.com/email/WEM2028.asp?cm_sp=Right%20Nav-_-email-_-wem2028

Only downside, the MBs aren't always what you need. That one only has 2 PCI slots, so if you've got a ton of extra cards in your machine for some reason that may not do. (Though I'm not sure what all you'd have. There isn't much left that isn't on-board.)

Bwaha...

I just got an email from the DDO mailing list, since I used to Beta that piece of shit.

Dungeons and Dragons: Online is now free for basic play. They've given up on trying to make money on subscriptions and have instead switched over to that shitty Korean system of charging you real money for everything worth having. Pay-only weapons, armors, races, etc.

So sad.

http://www.game-hub.co.uk/351/casual-gaming/news-free-wii-internet-browser-giveaway

Hey John...

As of this post like... two days ago... the Internet Browser on the Wii is free again.

Found this on the Wiki. Apparently it was made because of that post.
I'd buy a DS just for that game.

I had played all the big titles at E3. Private showings of God of War III, Heavy Rain, Alan Wake. But at 4:00 on Thursday, I was wandering around the show floor, wondering what else I had to see. I saw a small little booth for "Scribblenauts!" in the Warner Bros. Interactive Entertainment section. I mean, who goes to that booth? But I remember hearing about it on GAF, and so I decided to check it out.

Best game of E3? Without a fucking doubt. Anyone who says otherwise did not play Scribblenauts. Best game of all time? Jesus Christ, I don't know, maybe. It's a game that challenges your IMAGINATION. No other game has ever done that.

So listen to this story. I was in the early levels; I didn't quite have an idea of how ridiculously in-depth the database was. I was summoning things like ladders, glasses of water, rayguns, what have you. But I reached a level with zombie robots, and the zombie robots kept killing me. Rayguns didn't work, a torch didn't work, a pickaxe didn't work. In my frustration, I wrote in "Time Machine". And one popped up. What the fuck? A smile dawned on my face. I hopped in, and the option was given to me to either travel to the past or the future. I chose past. When I hopped out, there were fucking dinosaurs walking around. I clicked one, and realized I could RIDE THEM. So I hopped on a fucking DINOSAUR, traveled back to the present, and stomped the shit out of robot zombies. Did you just read that sentence? Did you really? I FUCKING TRAVELED THROUGH TIME AND JUMPED ON A DINOSAUR AND USED IT TO KILL MOTHERFUCKING ROBOT ZOMBIES. This game is unbelievable. Impossible. There's nothing you can't do.

Holy fucking shit.

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=16184727&postcount=217

Haha, I saw that on 4chan the other day, to be honest it looks kind of gross.

It's a bacon sandwich.
With fried chicken... as bread.

KFC is trying to deny this beautiful sandwich exists outside the test locations. We may never see it here.

http:
//www.foodgeekery.com/reviews/double-down-with-kfc/

Err... what happened to you?

Don't let the dogs play tug of war with the tube!

Catheterization sucks an unimaginable amount of suck. It's uncomfortable to stand, it's uncomfortable to sit, it's uncomfortable to lie down. And it's not the kind of 'pain' that pain medication does anything for, so the vicodins do jack diddly.


I finally brought my cushy computer chair back upstairs. Now I can sit down again. The wooden chair was impossible. This I can at least tolerate.

I've been counting the hours- less than 15 more to go. Tomorrow morning it should all go away. I may start to cry and hug the nurse.

Experience is 1,788.

@Farva - What the hell?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=69CPqJd44YM the true cow hitman

Lawl @ Farva the Hitman.

ty for the heads up

Hey Farva, you did all the meat carving training, right? I was flipping through the paper and saw Canaan Meats is hiring a Knife person. So they're either hiring a butcher or an up-close-and-personal hitman, and figured either way you might be interested. The ad just says send resume.

SHATZ i was thinking sat. for the lawn?

Looks like another NetHack clone.

Email address is Puppetodoom@yahoo.com.

Has anyone played Dwarf Fortress? I lurk a Traditional Gaming board, and they talk about this game a lot, seems like its pretty awesome. Seems like its Sims + Dwarves.
Edit- Piss, never mind, its a text image game, and I just can't get in to those, gets too confusing.

Alright, if you find Attack of the Beast Creatures I think we need to have another movie night.

Jeremy - Hell yes I have a copy of Truck Turner. Sadly though I've yet to watch it. I hear it is pretty badass. It is one of the movies that I was going to review for black history month. :)

Hey John,

I'm gonna' assume you've got this one since it's Isaac Hayes and (I've been told) on NetFlix... but you got this one? =D

I don't think it has any puppets unfortunately. ("OH GOD, WE'RE BEING NIBBLED ON BY... DOLLS? SHOULD WE DO SOMETHING? I'M JUST GOING TO STAND HERE AND SCREAM. AAAAAAAAAAH!")

Bubbles, what is your email address?

You know just about the time that I've thought there was nothing else for me to track down and watch I stumble across this... It is called Attack of the Beast Creatures and strangely enough has never seen a DVD release. :)

http://www.likecool.com/Resident_Evil_Comic-Con_T-Shirt--TShirt--Style.html

Coolest shirt ever? Probably.

Heh.

John- The Wild Life is corrupt? Yeah, either the copy got messed up when I transferred it to the drive, or you've got a codec issue. Plays just fine here.

I'll pop it on my thumb drive and give it to Jen tomorrow.

And I'll get those disks ordered soon. I hate being out of blanks.

Dude do you still have the original file for that movie you just gave me on the external. The kung fu movie is fine and I'll send a copy with Jen, but that other movie is corrupt. I'm hoping it is just the copy I have on the drive.

Jeremy - I'll split an order of the better DVDs with you. Sounds like a good deal.

John,

With shipping it looks like I can grab DVD-Rs for .25 a disk. 8x silver, no ring, Taiyo Yudens... damn good disks. No spindles- just a shrinkwrapped stack of disks.

Meritline has some odd pricing. Generics are .15 a disk, but shipping is almost $10. So it's like $23.99 w/ shipping for generic disks, or $25.99 for unbranded TYs... but shipping on those is free.

Oh well if they are going to try and make the game fun to play and easy to learn then screw them! Really though your post just makes me want to try the game out even more. Hell if it is fun and has a good multiplayer mode it might make me want to move my bastard tower again for some LAN party fun. Or hopefully there is a nice online venue we can just all log into. :)

I've already seen some MW fanboys complaining about MW5. Supposedly they're all huffy because this new version isn't planning on returning to the hardkore mechsim from MW1 & 2 where you have to spend all sorts of time plotting heat outputs and energy consumption and is going for a more "fast, arcade-style gameplay." You know, just lots of giant robot killing machines with weapon hardpoints where you pick your engine of death, slap a few AC10s on it, and go kick the shit out of each other.

Oh damn. They're going for fun instead of realism in a video game about giant walking tanks! Those bastards!

This rules

Hmmm it might be time for me to dust off the flight stick and upgrade my PC. I think this might be a game I could get into. Though that Atlas is in dire need of a paint job. :)

More MechWarrior News & Previews

Both videos removed. =(

Bastard YouTube threatened to ban his account so he pulled both videos. They were student films starring a very young Bruce Campbell and Sam Rami. Cool stuff.

Watch this and then tell me why it is cool. Because it really is cool.... :)

PORK OF THE BEAST.

http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/06/bonus_robs_transformers_2_faqs.php

Transformers 2 FAQ. This is funny.

it was 1 hour on the lawn i will get it next week from u shatz

simply put god hates me

You know just in case you guys thought I was full of shit when I started talking some of the goofy porn games for the atari 2600 check this video out.

Could also possibly be mice?? They love stuff like that too. Lets hope not though...

I think a bird built a nest on top of my refrigerator. =o

I keep that back sliding glass door open alot for the dogs, and I've forgotten to close it more than once before I leave. And I still have a few windows that sit wide open all the time without screens in them.

There is a freakin' nest built in the old ice tray I had sitting up there. Complete with those little nylon bags that were around those little peat pot starter things. I tossed 'em all into the gulley after I planted.



No bird... no idea where it went. I do have a couple of moths flying around that are almost big enough to be birds, but I don't think they build nests. Maybe it's a squirrel...

IMAGE SPAM!

Ahhhhhh a girl!

:)

I am totally facinated by that stuff too...and you just had to show me a link that does awesome animals ones?!!? That happen to be hundreds of dollars! Ugh...I can't get over how they are painting upside-down and then it suddenly turns into something.
Ya know..the whole time we were watching them in Vegas-which was as long as I could handle the fumes-We were thinking of how awesome it would be if you got into it. The spray paint kind...all it seemed was setting down layers and then taking them away for the big reveal. You can do it:) And I could cover my house in it! Hows things going up your way??

Hey sis! You finally got back on?

This guy charges between $29-69 for his work. Funny thing is, he's got this same style painting for $29... but the same painting done in 1-minute is $39.

I'm still gonna' be buying one. I'm fascinated by these speed painters. I'd love to see a performance like this live:

Those paintings are awesome. There are guys that do that on Fremont Street in Vegas. I wanted to buy some of them SO bad, but they are like $40 and up...still wish I would have splurged. They make practically anything you can think up.

Wow...

Farv,

You need to update your Alltel account with your new address. I'm getting things here in your name.

Also, you got something from Alltel. If you're expecting a bill, you probably want this.

I hate you Michael Bay.

(Unless he has the voice. If he still has the voice, he could transform into a garbage can and he'd still be the coolest robot evar.)


Soundwave superior. Giant space vagina, inferior.

so my new game is up and runnig.

http://ziza.ru/2009/06/10/marionetkigiganty_32_foto.html
jeremey go here it is something cool from the guy who did stings the move

Okay this is pretty funny.

Video Games | ScrewAttack | Angry Video Game Nerd: Super Mario Bros 3 and The Wizard

XBox 360 | Playstation 3 | Nintendo Wii

I do so enjoy the AVGN!

Farv,

Whenever you get the time, if you want to keep making regular trips back to the house on Brentwood you can keep hacking at the back yard.

Bring a machete.

my new cell number3302017599

Oh My Goodness!

Image.... in.... head....

*Grabs hammer and smashes out brains*

It's a very manlyman game, actually. From what I can tell various characters keep trying to steal your protein drink mix. So all the bodybuilders have to chase the thief down.

I don't think I've turned gay. I do occasionally oil myself down and flex for a while after playing, but that's totally straight, in that Spartan kind of way. Just not the way that had sex with boys.

Jeremy - So after playing it do you feel gay? I mean I would think that is the natural result of playing the game. :P

Yes I know that I'm the one that brought the thing to your attention.....

Muscle March is totally running.
Took about two hours tracking down the right cracks to get around some of the anti-piracy fixes Nintendo introduced in their latest firmware (which apparently I shouldn't have upgraded to...) but I slapped that bitch around for a while. I now have a Wii that can run Homebrew / Virtual Carts.

And Muscle March is totally gay.

Richard Simmons gay.

Faaabulously gay.

I. Want. One.


http://gamu-toys.info/sonota/sw/obama/obama.html

WiiWare. That's a downloadable title, not a disk.

Hmmn... I've never tried to install a rip of one before.
I'd have to do some reading just to figure out how to do it...

Okay I'm thinking the Wii is now officially gay. Just saying....



Crap after watching this example of gameplay I'm thinking that Jeremy really needs to find it! I need to see this live.

So I know that I tossed the boards and cannabalized the minis, but I think I still have the VHS for the next movie night!

Well, I have no reason to continue this. This is the farm I have to compete with?

Fawkes:

I'm still trying to remember what episode of Family Guy that was from...

Hey Dave Ray,

Were you still wanting to do lawn work here at the house? I've got weeds that need dealt with and still lots of brush to relocate to the gully.

And did you happen to grab a box of AV cables when you moved out?
I've literally gone through every box in the house now and I still can't find about half the cables for my entertainment system. All my component video (5 line - RGB WR), a 3-in-1 component cable for the video game systems, and some of my HDMI stuff is all lost in the ether.

I did find the bungie web for the truck, and a big ol' bottle of your horse shampoo.

John,

I found one of those gems already in this DVD collection.
Vampire Hunter, by a guy named Sean Gallimore. http://www.seangallimore.com/
Writer, Director, Artist (I've seen some of this guy's fantasy portfolio before...). And apparently he's also a Martial Arts Badass Extraordinare.

He mentions it on his site. $5000 budget on Hi-8. Solid work. Audio quality is absolute shiat, though... which is unfortunate, since much of the dialog was actually worth listening to.

A video everyone on this blog can relate to.

Jeremy - Sweet I thought you might get a kick out of it.

Re: Stagefright...



Umn... is that a dude, with an owl's head, and a chain saw?
.... Huh.

(I love this damn movie, John. =D)

I wasn't missing books. I was looking for someone who had New World of Darkness books I could borrow or buy on the cheap. John has some I think I'm gonna pick up today though so it's all good. Of course if anyone has the Changling book, that would be cool to have as well.

Scott:

What books did you say you were looking for? I found the box with all my gaming stuff in it and have gone through it looking for strays that might have gotten picked up when we were still playing, but I didn't see anything I didn't recognize, save for an extra copy of Monster Manual II.

Farva,

You'd asked about a wireless router. I have no spares to sell, but if you're looking for one I recommend:

http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.aspx?Item=N82E16833704002
$32.29 shipped. I use this model myself, and have picked up two others to work in customer's homes for small personal networks. Solid, basic router, with great range.


http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.aspx?Item=N82E16833124321
Newegg also has this recert on special right now for $22.99 shipped. Reviews are pretty solid, but I've never used one, so I can't comment on anything but the price.

Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film As 'Fun, Watchable'

Some Star Trek related posts for you guys.





Oh and I remember watching this on T.V. Star Trek DS9 was an awesome show.



Who needs that bullshit in the theater this weekend?

Okay this is just funny. Be warned it isn't work safe.

John,

That picture I posted was a screencap from that Dante movie I reviewed. I know I've seen those little fuckers used somewhere else, though. I still can't remember where...

Scott:

Did you ever find the rest of the WW books you were trying to hunt down?


***

I was digging through my Yahoo account today. Found this I'd sent to myself back in 2004. No idea what the heck it was for... maybe a character backstory or a game I was writing, or something. Unfortunately, it wasn't prophecy, as Chupa(cabra) wasn't discovered till late 2008, and there are no mention of vampires that sparkle.


World Timeline:

2007: Scientists in Brazil discover the first conclusive evidence of
the “Vampire.” A live Chupacabra is captured- a wild, semi-intelligent
dog-like creature that feeds exclusively on the blood of other animals.
Along with this discovery, a previously unknown tribe of warriors who
hunt these creatures.

This discovery reflames the myths of the existence of other vampires.

2008: Environmentalists push for legislation that labels the Chupacabra
as a highly endangered species. This outlaws the hunting and killing of
the Chupacabra for any reason, even by native tribes.

2010: Many tribesman arrested or killed by law enforcement for
poaching. Chupacabra populations continue to rise.

2012: Chupacapbra populations expand to dangerous levels, threatening
local populations. Many reported deaths. Legislation protecting the
Chupacabra repealed, and hunting parties organized.

2012: Environmentalist groups form giant “Save the Chupacabra” sit-in
groups, forming human chains and shields to prevent large-scale hunting
parties from reaching known Chupacabra lairs. Over 1000 PETA members
killed during sit-in during massive Chupacabra attack.

2013: Fueled on by the growing fan-base, and having been hunted
nearly to extinction the first group of true Vampires break the
masquerade and revel themselves to the public, thinking they may be
able to use human sympathy to their advantage.

2013: Vampires explain that their existence in mythology was mostly
true, and offer a public apology for crimes in the past. Explains to
public that modern vampires no longer feed on humans- subsist on animal
blood and artificially-produced blood plasmas. This is met with some
skepticism, but an unusual percentage of the population seems to go
along with it without complaint.

2013: As expected, the appearance of Vampires leads to an increase in
violence versus Vampire kind. More and more vampires continue to make
themselves known, including a number of major players in politics and
major industry.

2013: Vampires lobby to force the Government to admit to the hunting
and eradication of the Vampire clans. FBI records are uncovered showing
that almost 90% of the “Unknown” deaths reported each year are
Vampires. AIDS ws a government experiment at a silently-administered
“vaccine” against Vampire infection that backfired.

2014: Vampires lobby and are added to the list of those with “Protected
Status.” Assault to any Vampire-kind is now an established “Hate
Crime.” Thousands more Goths and Vampire Wannabes openly seek the
embrace. “Bite Mark” scarriring becomes popular among the non-embraced.

2015: Thousands of so-called “Vampire Hunters” are arrested and
prosecuted under increasingly stiff “Vampire Hate Laws.” These laws
continue to be passed without almost no resistance. Gallop polls show
Vampire acceptance to be well over 70%. TV Sitcoms begin to air. Top
Rated Shows include “Fasionable Tremere,” “Everybody loves a Malkavian.
Over 2-dozen movies hit the box office over the next few years
starring Vampires as the Heroic lead.

2016: With almost no previous announcement, the first Vampire announces
his candidacy for president. After a short Supreme Court Argument, it
is decided that the text of the Constitution decrees nothing about
human or non-human kind running for president- just age and
nationality. All Vampires born in the United States are considered
therefore nationalized and eligible for Presidency.

2016: The first Vampire is elected as President by one state. Other
parties insist on vote manipulation by some high-level form of
Dominance, demand re-vote. Courts tell opponents to stop whining.

2020: Vampires continue to face less and less resistance over the next
four years. Anti-vampire “hate crimes” continue, though at a
decreasing frequency. Instead of jail, special “Reform Camps” are
established for re-education of Vampire-based crimes. Vampire
president elected for a second term by a landslide victory.

2022: Having established a solid foothold into American life, Vampire
kind becomes less careful about guarding their secrets. The truth about
Vampire kind begins to come out.

2024: Underground militant groups begin to surface to battle the
Vampires. Most are met with a swift destruction.

haha

Funny Videos | Funny Cartoons | More Video Clips

Could have been worse

Damn man I haven't a clue. Where did you get that picture? I need to figure this out now.

Monkey Fighting Snakes would make a good name for a Kung-Fu movie.

John, (or anyone really...) do these buggers look at all familiar to you?




Glowing space starfish.
Parasite Eve? Maybe a Star Trek episode?
I feel like I've seen these things before, or at least something damn similar. Maybe they were inky black... but I can't place it.

John getting his props on. And yes, as was mentioned, you're the quote, name and site on the preview clip. Rock on.

Oh shit... you even got the site name in the still-frame of the youtube trailer.

This might be the funniest T.V. edit that I've ever seen.

So I almost crapped my pants on this one guys. This link is for an article on Fangoria's website. Check out the trailer about half way down the page.

click here

See you all laughed. Thought that I was just a weirdo.... Well I recommend that you all stay far away from WalMart, it is mine!

And yes I know it is a joke.

Wait how did I never end up with one of these back in the day?

Table Of Malcontents Just another WordPress weblog
Robot Identifies Human Flesh As Bacon

* By John Brownlee Email Author
* November 8, 2006 |
* 11:57 am |
* Categories: Uncategorized

0903wbotjpg

Let the robot holocaust commence: robots think we taste like bacon.

Researchers at NEC System technologies and Mie University have designed the cute little guy to the right: a metal man gastronomist, “an electromechanical sommelier”, capable of identifying wines, cheeses, meats and hors d’oeuvres. Upon being given a sample, he will speak up in a childlike voice and identify what he has just been fed. The idea is that wineries can tell if a wine is authentic without even opening the bottle, amongst other more obscure uses…like “tell me what this strange grayish lump at the back of my freezer is/was.”

But when some smart aleck reporter placed his hand in the robot’s omnivorous clanking jaw, he was identified as bacon. A cameraman then tried and was identified as prosciutto.

Absolutely horrifying. Like cows, once robots taste blood, their hunger for human flesh can never be satiated.

Japanese unveil robot wine steward [South Coast Today]

Damn I'm a lazy bastard. I haven't had sound on my computer since I hooked it up. Been using headphones. But I took my headphones downstairs a few days ago to use Skype on the laptop. I figured, I have to walk downstairs anyway... might as well get my speakers. Heh...

I'd seen Bible Stories. I think I've even got the ROM of that somewhere. I'd not even heard of the others. Especially that Wolfenstein rip-off. That's... awesome really.


My Mom just watched Star Wars Ep. 1-6. Here is a one-minute review of the new trilogy she just emailed me:

"In the first movie I liked the little boy.
He was cute. The movie was ok, nothing special.
In the second one I liked yoda and Samuel L.
That is the only thing. The acting sucked.
The third one I watched just to watch it.
Now I can say I saw them all."

Fair enough. ..

"And I also watched Snakes on a Plane! Good movie!"

Coolest. Mom. Evar.

Holy Shit Jeremy have you ever seen that SNES game? A first person shooter with Moses. I might actually have found a reason to finally buy an SNES.

http://dvice.com/archives/2009/04/talking-gadget-1.php
http://dvice.com/archives/2009/04/talking-gadget-2.php

Really? What doesn't work?

Gutmunchers is not a PSP-browser friendly site.

It scares me that I recognized that as the Star Wars special from the paused shot.

So I've been holding on to some free rentals from Hollywood Video. Just went to redeem them last night before they expired, and came home with mostly crap. Their selection of Wii games to rent blows ass, and the couple of games I'd actually wanted to play (like Madworld) weren't even available. (Not checked out- just not there.) So I picked up two titles based on the name or cover art.

Castlevania... oooh. Sucks. It's some Soul Calibur hack bullshit vs. fighting game. Oh, and it's designed to work with Wii controls, so each character has a grand total of three attacks. Lame.

Ok, Rygar. Recognized the name. Remake of a 1986 Techmo arcade game. Rocked ass then. Now it is 3D, and a bit late. It's the game God of War ripped off. God of War did it better. It's not horrible, but I've done this already. And the Wii gimic is starting to annoy me. The controls are neat for a while- whipping your weapons around with the controller and all, but eventally it just gets tiring and the amusement is gone.

So I put in the movie I also grabbed. "The Spirit." It wasn't horrible, but it felt... hollow. It was a bunch of mediocre between the scenes Samuel L. Jackson was on screen. Playing an insane mad scientist with guns. Or occasionally dressed like a Nazi. or a Samurai. Totally worth it in that Snakes on a Plane kind of... 'meh... meh... meh... aw hell yea bad muthafucka! meh... meh... say what again! meh...' kind of way...

Bea Arthur has died. :(



The Day of the Dead remake is stupid. Harmless but stupid. See my review.

Who run bartertown internet?

ok then how about this then http://www.ninjai.com/

Wow, Farv... a 2003 flash animation about a 1996 Dead Alewives sketch.
You show those internets who's boss!

hey guys u all should see this /www.cybermoonstudios.com/8bitDandD.html

John I assume you've seen this?

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810061258/video/13140292

I don't know why I'm watching the remake of Day of the Dead. But I am. In my defense, it is on instant watch.
Zombies with guns.
Zombies able to dodge automatic weapons fire.
Vegetarian Zombie (graaaains) pets... in love. Who is nicknamed Bud.
Wallcrawler zombies.
Secret Government conspiracy (when there is no more room in hell, the US government viral weapon research lab will have a containment failure)
Zombie on zombie crimes.
Its complicated.
That's all I have to say.

This is a 1973 design for the Catholic Church's Archdiocesan Youth Commission.

I need say no more.

GOD DAMN IT! They finally make an app for an iPhone that I really want to check out and they ban the damn thing!

White People Problems

Atom.com: Funny Videos | Atom Originals | Sing-Alongs

o my god u all hav to see this

Global Computers (aka. Tiger Direct) has a 50" HD TV on sale right now.
For Earth Day.
It's their Earth Day special.

Because the first thing I think about when I'm asked about how I'm going to celebrate some hippy drum-circle celebration made-up holiday, I think "I'm going to buy a giant fucking TV. Probably from China. They make the best shit."

Okay any reviewer who thinks that a reboot of a series is the better than the original is full of shit. Really I haven't seen the new Star Trek movie, and never will. Shatner is Kirk, Nimoy is Spock, and De Kelley is Bones. Anything else is bullshit!

Really I'm not kidding or joking about this. I've seen so many of my favorite horror movies butchered by reimainging them or remaking them, with some critics and no nothing teenage fans saying the new ones are better. Now I have to watch someone do this to Star Trek? No way no how. I shall never speak of this again.

KHAAAAAAAAAAANNN!!!

Reviewers are saying the new Star Trek is the best of the series so far.
Is that possible? I mean... Wrath of Kahn.

Not saying anything.... Just posting this because it is funny.

Hollywood needs to do a remake of Beat Street.
Scene-for-scene.

There isn't much left for them to do at this point...

I think I found our next feature presentation for movie night! Electric Bugaloo baby!

Jeremy - Thanks dude I was worried it was just going to be me and Mussolini in hell. Now I won't be lonely. :P

Watched a double feature of Zombie Jesus and Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter for Easter. Worst part is that I think I'm the only one who thinks that is funny. But it was a "Gutmunchers" holiday for sure.

Yay! Easter dinner!

I always wondered what Red Dwarf would look like with a budget. Guess I know now.

You laughed and yes, you are going to hell. AnotherRandomDay.com

Saw this one and had to share.

Jeremy - Mixing Star Wars and Strong Bad is... awesome!

Also why was I not informed of the return of Red Dwarf? Damn it why do I hang out with you guys if you aren't on the look out for my favorite shows? :P

He would have known over valued real estate was a trap.

That's the beautiful thing about ThinkGeek- even their hoaxes radiate so much awesome reality alters itself to make it happen.

Give it a year, and they'll be real products. It's happened with just about every April Fools product they've introduced. The 8-Bit Tie, the Personal Soundtrack T-Shirt...

Which means as long as Lucas isn't a flaming prick about the image rights they'll have a tauntaun sleeping bag real soon now.

Scientists are already working on the squeeze-bacon. I'm sure of it.

I so want one of these. If it were only so that this weren't an April 1st joke.

Farve - Not trying to be picky but I think it was shooting lightning out of it's nipples. :)

Jeremy you spend far too much time on the internets. :P

So hows the new place treatin' ya, Farv?

o my god it had nipple laser's !

When playing Cthulhu I've always wondered what happens to the mind when you lose sanity. Do you know when it happens? How does it feel when you feel a little bit of your mind slip away?

I imagine it feels something like what just happened to my brain watching this:

I see nothing leaked, yet, but...
20th Century Boys: Chapter 2 airs at Cinefest on the 29th.
I'd imagine they'll be at minimum a cam copy very shortly, if not a rip right off the master.

And apparently it is a 3-parter.

Jeremy - Since you did so well finding In Search of could you look for a movie called Sledgehammer? It is a killer old slasher flick from the 80s that I've been dying to see. Let me know and of course I'll hook a brother up for the effort.

They're done. All the AVIs fit on one DVD. I'll have it for you this weekend.

Jeremy - That is awesome! Let me know when you have them and I'll start working on my evil DVD plan. :)

John,

In Search Of, Season 1. 24 Episodes is on the way.

In Search Of.. Strange Visitors (aka Oracle Chamber
In Search Of.. Ancient Aviators (aka Ancient Flight)
In Search Of.. The Bermuda Triangle
In Search Of.. Bigfoot
In Search Of.. Killer Bees
In Search Of.. Earthquakes
In Search Of.. The Mummy's Curse
In Search Of.. Martians
In Search Of.. Atlantis
In Search Of.. Psychic Detectives
In Search Of.. A Call From Space
In Search Of.. Learning ESP
In Search Of.. Nazi Plunder
In Search Of.. Amelia Earhart
In Search Of.. Dracula
In Search Of.. The Easter Island Massacre
In Search Of.. Ghosts
In Search Of.. Life After Death (aka Near Death Experiences)
In Search Of.. The Loch Ness Monster
In Search Of.. UFOs
In Search Of.. Voodoo
In Search Of.. Inca Treasures
In Search Of.. The Magic of Stonehenge

Farva,

Doin' pretty good. Still trying to keep ahead of the house repairs. Got all the garbage left in the upstairs bedroom swept up, and my bed and desk moved upstairs while I redo the basement. I've got a pool table ready to be picked up, but I have to get the floor finished downstairs before I have a half-ton of wood and slate plopped down in the middle of the room. So I put the rest of the house on hold and I'm working down there right now. Carpet is up, and I'm patching the walls while I wait for the new stuff to come in. (I'm going to be using carpet tiles.)

Just got the last of the shit that was left behind out of the townhouse and the trash drug out to the curb. Kitchen could still use a good cleaning, but fuck 'em. Not going to happen. I've wasted enough of my time over there as it is.
A crew comes in to paint the place Monday and Tuesday, and the Realtor should have it listed shortly after.

That white board is laying by the side of the townhouse if you still want it. I've got nothing to use it for.

Man, I sooooooo wish this was going to be a real movie!

Oh and yes I told you so! BlueRay is almost cheap enough for me to try it out now. Though I'm waiting for it to be closer to $100 bucks. :)

Spiderman + Giant Robot = Awesome on a level never experienced by humanity before.

Oh, John... here is the game review site I was talking about. He does everything, including the 2600 section.

http://www.videogamecritic.net/index.htm

Yeah, yeah, yeah, wow.
When did Spiderman get a fucking robot?!
Yeah, yeah, yeah, wow!

Friday April 17th at the Canton Palace theater they are having a 3 Stooges film festival! So who is in with me? I know that Scott is in, what about the rest of you knuckleheads? I mean 3 Stooges on actual film in a theater!

Farve - That works for me. I should be around most of Friday night, so just give me a call. Oh and I completely forgot to let you know that we had to put Molly down on Monday. She was really sick. :(

sorry john i've been gone latey i will give u a call fri. and swing by .
Jeremy how r the dogs and u doing ?
hi to all the rest of u guys.

MY GOD THE AWESOMENESS HAS KILLED MY BRAIN CELLS........

Jeremy - That Man from UNCLE box set looks awesome! Oh and so does this.





Farve - Dude I don't know if you missed the old post but you won another DVD from Gutmunchers. You need to let me know how I can get it to you. And no I'm not spending money to mail it to someone who lives a couple blocks away from me! :)

This looks cool in a sort of retarded way. I might go to the theaters if it is playing anywhere around here.

The Elyria Library has the 41-disk Man from U.N.C.L.E. box set. =o
No holds, though.

I may be making a road trip... library tour of another Clevnet branch. Yeah. That's the ticket.

Farve - I don't know if you were trying to insert a link or something, but it doesn't seem to have worked. What did you want us to check out?

The new podcast is up and I'm sort of proud of it, so here is another link to the player.


Subscribe Free
Add to my Page

There is something awesome about this photo.

I wonder how many bodies they've dredged up doing this?

john have u seen this

Bloody Mallory?

Before I forget this is the cool movie site that I've been talking about.

Why doesn't anything cool like this ever happen to me?

ha ha that was funny

Farve - That was cool.

Dr. Fawkes - Rue the day sir. You shall rue the day you tangled with me. :P

"Where the hell is Farve?" John wondered, as he tossed some tissues into the trash can. "I'm wasting all this material without him around." John frowned, and put the cap back on the hand lotion.

here u go jon

A couple of things here.

1. Jeremy you threaten to show them your wangdoodles, there is a difference.

2. Dunesmuggler you didn't know that Farva was a part time fairy? He didn't get paid or anything, he did it for the childrens. :)

Where the hell is Farve? I'm wasting all this material without him around. :(

It was his diabeetus.
When his blood sugar gets too high, he gets all crazy like that.
It was at least 250 in that photo.

I'm not going to apologize about the Oompa-Loompas, though. I've got a lot of work to do here, and they work cheaper than even illegal Mexicans. They're also handy to work in crawlspaces, or to send down the heating vents to recover dropped screws. I don't have to keep them chained up, either- all I had to do is tell them we've got whangdoodles all over the place outside, and they won't even leave the house.

*Looks at the picture that John posted for a few moments*


So.... that's what happened to Farva.

On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

Chuck Norris, Jackie Chan and van Damme met St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. Peter takes them through and shows them around - Chan and van Damme ooh and aah, Chuck Norris just keeps mum. Then Peter brings them before God. He points to two thrones: one to the right of God and one to the left of God. God speaks in a booming voice -

"One of you will sit on my right, and the other will sit on my left, the third will have to go home. Try and convince me that you deserve the seat of your choice more than the other."

van Damme goes first "I am a kickboxer par excellence, I have acted in many movies, but since I know that you reward meekness and humility, I will take the smaller throne to your left, and serve you for eternity!"

God is suitably impressed and he smiles.

Chan tries to one-up van Damme and tells God that he won't choose either seat and let the other 2 take them. God is happy with his answer and offers him the seat to his right.

God then asks Chuck Norris to step forward and present his case - Chuck Norris stares coldly at God and asks Peter "Who is that old guy sitting in my seat?"

I don't remember that scene in Willy Wonka.

Yes they are awesome, but this will blow your mind.....

Well I know what airline Scott is going to be flying from now on! :)



Northwest airlines now with more Penis.

I may need to get that book.

http://www.amazon.com/Pride-Prejudice-Zombies-Classic-Ultraviolent/dp/1594743347/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1236092341&sr=8-1

No...words...should have sent a poet.

John, I think we found your 2nd book review for the site.

Glad to hear your father's doing better.

It was another stent to open up a blockage. This makes 18.

John,
Glad to hear your Dad is doing OK.
What was he in for, anyway? Another blockage?
Surgery? Did they put another stint in?

Everyone have a great weekend. I'm going home and going to catch up on some sleep. At least that is the plan. :P

Farve - You are a wiener! I have a copy of Epitaph for you. Let me know when you can pick it up. Congrats.

Dave - Weapon Brown is in my office. I did bring it back. :)

Okay so here is why I hate hospitals.

My father gets checked into Timken Mercy on Tuesday night. They literally have no beds and when they do have room for him they put him in with a psycho. Seriously this guy sits in his bed and says to no one in particular, "I told them not to put anyone in here. Some one is going to pay." My dad can't sleep at all, and the couple of times he closes his eyes he opens them to find the guy staring at him from the edge of his bed! My father, who is in there for chest pain, ends up sleeping in the waiting room the night before he goes in for surgery.

The next day they were all tripping over themselves to apologize. That is except for the patient advocate (who works for the hospital, what a joke that is) who wants to defend the staff and has the nerve to say that they couldn't not treat the nut job. Then on Thursday because they are still having issues with available beds they send my father home at 1 p.m. less than 24 hours after surgery (which they never do). I mean why send patients elsewhere when you can bill two people for the same bed. Bastards.

Anyway he is home and resting now. But Timken Mercy certainly caused a lot of stress and grief to a man that didn't need it.

How's your father doing John?

P.S.- Hospitals make great places to pass out religious texts.

Dude that is awesome. I so need to print some of these out and leave them around town as "tips" like they used to do with those Chick Tracts back in the 70s!

http://www.fredvanlente.com/downloads/WhyWeHere.pdf

Chick Lovecraft Tract

I'm doing ok.
Getting better but still in pain.

Well I would imagine you can web surf. Will it allow you to download and update plug ins? That was always the big failing for us when we were looking at that sort of appliance or device here at work. Everything is web based and if you can't keep your browser current you quickly end up with a solitaire machine. :)

I don't remember the make and model... I'd have to look at one again. It's some wireless tablet-PC deal running a stripped-down version of Windows. Touchscreen. Awesome for Solitaire and Crayon Physics, but I guess you can do actual work on them, too.

Sweet. What kind of hand held are they using? Is this for the staff or are you guys just demoing it?

Oh and Gutmunchers looks good on everything.... Oh yeah.

I'm posting this from a handheld in Rittman. Guttmunchers looks great on the small-screen. (And I lol'd at the new comic.)

Jeremy - Two observations.

1. I had hoped that the zombie Wii game would rule, but most zombie games fail for the reasons you pointed out. Thanks for saving me the money that I would have spent buying a Wii for a shitty game.

2. That was an excellent review. If you handle your eventual anime reviews like that you will be miles ahead of most of the other reviewers.

ps: Talk to Jen if you see this at work. Tis Friday and the buffet is calling to me.


Scott - How are you feeling today? I hope that none of your other organs has been possessed with a homicidal rage and is trying to kill you. Also wanted to let you know that I put up another of your reviews today (Zombie Strippers). Cheers.


And to end things here is another killer cartoon...

You laughed and yes, you are going to hell. AnotherRandomDay.com